Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
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