Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
Randomize
