No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Porn is love you can see.
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Randomize
