New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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