Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
