So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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