I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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