i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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