Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
