Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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