I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Who put my cat in the fridge?
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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