Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize