i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize