Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize