Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
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Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
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i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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