youre lurking in front of me
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have started to decorate penises.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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