Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
