i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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