I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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