dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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