I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize