Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize