this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
Randomize
