Nicole vs. Life
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
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