Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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