Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Watching her eat just hurts me
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
