Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.

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(206): View more from Washington

Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.

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(708): View more from Illinois

Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(313): View more from Michigan

well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.

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(480): View more from Arizona

The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.

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(586): View more from Michigan

friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday

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