So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
