Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Randomize
