she is the kim kardashian of front butts
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
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