I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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