I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize