You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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