He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
The chlamydia really affected his face.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
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