Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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