Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Randomize
