Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Panties = found
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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