it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
