i just google imaged poop.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
