4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
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