just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
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If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
She needs sedatives and a leash
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
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