just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
