You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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