I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
