I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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