Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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