Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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