At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize