The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
