this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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