girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
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