ADVERTISEMENT

• (513): View more from Ohio

  I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.

  Fav 14 3032 1218

  share tweet
  

• (404): View more from Georgia

  Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial

  Fav 27 4988 938

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?

  Fav 28 5353 2033

  share tweet
  

• (224): View more from Illinois

  It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'

  Fav 12 1720 4222

  share tweet
  

• (815): View more from Illinois

  i don't really know how much tequila is too much

  Fav 16 4725 1985

  share tweet
  

• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.

  Fav 5 1177 3123

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity

  Fav 5 2189 1013

  share tweet
  

• (519): View more from Ontario

  I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen

  Fav 2 744 1107

  share tweet
  

• (701): View more from North Dakota

  You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"

  Fav 0 1547 649

  share tweet
  

• (310): View more from California

  All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.

  Fav 2 1750 635

  share tweet
  

• (949): View more from California

  He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.

  Fav 0 470 592

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (801): View more from Utah

  All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.

  Fav 1 150 249

  share tweet
  

• (303): View more from Colorado

  that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.

  Fav 0 413 165

  share tweet
  

• (702): View more from Nevada

  Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan

  Fav 9 336 431

  share tweet
  
ADVERTISEMENT

• (239): View more from Florida

  Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear

  Fav 0 43 50

  share tweet
  

Randomize